Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Emergency Broadcast System

While searching for images to post with this blog in regards to how much I hate the #FailWhale...I came across this glorious picture:

Which lead me to THIS BLOG

Which made me realize it really isn't the whales fault at all.

It is how the Government takes over and deletes something we aren't suppose to know. Right now, some one just tweeted something we NEED to know. Some vital clue to what is really going on. She just had her front door thrown in and is now being black bagged. Drug off, kicking and silently screaming while her neighbor sits reading the, no wait, watching TV, wondering WHY Angela Jolie wants to have another baby and get fat AGAIN?

I'm not paranoid. Really. Just very well informed.

*notices her tin foil hat should probably be re-designed...*

I wonder if it actually IS zombies this time? Somewhere in some remote place there was just an outbreak and the dieing are grasping for anyway to contact the outside world. Twitter!!! People need to know! Hurry! Blood everywhere! National Level EBS

Maybe I need to just go back to bed and wait....

**I came back to add that I've got the #BoobieWed avatar taken care of. Seems to have fixed everything on Twitter. *whew*

Monday, May 17, 2010


About eight years ago, I started working in sales and marketing with Avon. I also started selling stuff on the Internet years and years ago, and as everyone knows, a single year in "technology time" -- well, that's a LOOOONG time. I started in online sales way back in the day on Ebay. So successfully as a matter of fact, I even had a PayPal account of mine hacked (previous account that was quickly terminated, of course). I always thought that if a person was interested in hacking your PayPal account, well, you must be one hell of a seller. *bows*

Now, my house is nearly paid off and I own seven cars. My inked skin alone is worth over $10,000. I am happily married with two wonderful kids . . . sounds idyllic and so easy right?

Well, the first of those two wonderful kids was the result of that guy I'm happily married to knocking me up while we were in high school. And all of my cars? Well, none some of them dont actually "run," but if you ask my husband he says "technically" you *could* get them around the least once. Maybe. I never made it to college, and I've had my battles with drug abuse, I have run away, and I wasted a lot of my life being selfish. And while I've been successful at what I've done, my husband always paid the bills, so there was no threat of failing.

Over the last year and a half, I have literally changed my life around. I wrote a post for GeekGirlsNetwork which puts it pretty well and without all of the drama of the I-had-it-worse-than-you bullshit. I am not looking for pity, just for folks to join me in celebration. Anyway, I have wanted for a long time to incorporate my personal life with my "business" life. I feel like I have always been fighting between choosing to be professional vs. being fun. Being professional equaling fitting the mold and doing things the same way everyone else does, and being fun meaning, well, being me! My major problem is I can't even imagine being one of those fake people who puts on a stupid facade and hides who they really are from the rest of the world. (Go read that link if you have no clue what I am talking about.

I think a lot of us are really afraid to admit we are lame. It is SO easy to be whatever you want. Thank you World Wide Web. But I digress.

My point is that in this past year and a half I started accepting who I was. I didn't avoid it, I rolled around in it, and slowly but surely, who I was online began to match who I was IRL. It has the most amazing transformation I have ever been through. Twitter especially helped me not only feel out what it would be like being myself but also in helping me realize I like who I am.

And it keeps getting better!

Today, I landed my first purchase order with! And they were the ones who contacted ME! *squuueee!* I got an email from them expressing interest back on April 23rd, 2010. I nearly passed out.

And it still keeps getting better! (I know - you all might want to catch your breath and pace yourself, cuz this next one is HUGE!)

Guess what Lesley and I made?

THIS!!!! ---> G33Kmade

In a very literal story of one thing leading to another G33kmade is a celebration of us REAL AND ORIGINAL artist/crafter/parents/children/clowns/notreallyclonwsRORYisafraidofclowns/friends/whinersandmoaners-type folks. We create things. We are driven. We do not care what ANYONE thinks of our obsession with perfect. What we create with our hands is a reflection of who we are, of WHAT we are. Many of us started by creating things for friends and family, and whether we did it because we cared or because we were short on cash and couldn't actually *buy* people things like normal people has nothing to do with it. Our creations are and continue to be the stories of what we have LIVED and DREAMED.

MY POINT... G33kmade is a celebration of real people. Of what we make. Of what we obsess about. Not only the what we made, but how we made it, and if you're lucky (and we happen to know) why we made it.

I'm so excited, I'm all tingly! <3

Monday, May 10, 2010

Insert Interesting Blog Title Here

I'm trying!!! Today Rory and I shipped forty Soap in Carbonite soaps. *whew* Same goal for tomorrow! (I actually started writing this blog on is now Friday...) Just wanted to let everyone know I didn't take your money and leave the country! Though Canada sounds lovely....

Last week I had posted about how to get a hold of me. I am SO happy that you are indeed, getting a hold of me.

I have actually had a few of you express joy because I am NOT a robot. I am a real person. *waves* (If you were to ask anyone if I have ever posted a no makeup, in my comfy clothes, non edited, messy house background pic, they would instantly tell you no. Go look at my TwitPic See? It is so full of cute...and sarcasm)

Dearest customers, I am doing everything possible to get your orders out the door. I swear to you. PLEASE feel free to nag, email, call, tweet, text...Anything! I can't always get to replying right away, I am not ignoring you. Sometimes I shower and I would HATE to get my phone wet...Sometimes I sleep...but more than likely, I am in the shower....

I digress.

Customer Service.

The top thing I am noticing from customer inquiries is that the majority of you are shocked I even care. That I am indeed, not a robot. I am going to take a second here and brag. You can check out my rocking Etsy Feedback HERE and HERE Over 1,300 happy transactions.

If I were you I would be pissed I didn't have my order yet. I am not asking for my customer to just brush this off. I am asking you work with me. Let's hug it out. I have said it before, and I now say it again, I LOVE what I do. I love making things and I love every single aspect of learning how to run a business with this high of volume. I want everyone to know, ALL SOAPS WILL BE (finally) SHIPPED NEXT WEEK! I kid you not. Haven t gotten your order yet? Oh baaaaby it is coming your way in under seven to ten days. ♥

In all seriousness, Thank you. When you email me telling me you love your orders and you wait for me to finally get on twitter or finally reply to your email...It means so much to me that I am working with friends.

Now, that is enough mush and love for one day. I will be out of town this weekend and *trying* not to work, so I have GOT to PWN this Friday like non other. Really rip this Friday a new one. It also happens to be #FollowFriday on Twitter and I probably wont get to a picture or posts. SO! Go follow everyone I follow and love the cuss out of them.

Again @jeffisageek is rocking my socks off.... He melts me with his kind words. ♥ If you dont follow him, you should. He has the hook ups when it comes to cool.

And could you do me a giant big favor and give some love in the way of
@UberDorkGirlie She is working on the coolest project EVER. Take these surveys. They are quick and know you are sitting there doing nothing anyway. ♥

Time to get my work on! ♥

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Copy Cat

I want everyone to know that I LOVE @GEEKSOAP a.k.a Lesley. Really. Did you know that she was going to debut a similar soap to mine and didn't? Nope. She had the very same idea as I did, but being the wonderful person that she is, she simply and ever so politely suggested I have the item. Three weeks later this item is the cause of life-changing events for me.

Yesterday was my husbands last night of “work”. He had a shitty job that wasted his talents. But it pays the bills you say! Gasp! Seriously...screw the bills. Yes, yes, I know, I know . . . we all need to pay for our cable, car payments, new toys, new shoes, whatever the TV is telling us is cool.

But the truth is you don't need all of that shit . . . really, you don't. However, I am not going to lie and say that I wouldn't spend thousands of dollars on this. I would. I really, really would.

My point.

You never know when one single act of kindness will change someones life.

I make soap. Lesley makes soap. I am going to now pimp Lesley's soap

I have come across some truly wonderful people in the last year. Which is a good thing, as I have no room in my life for unnecessary negativity. I don't want to be angry all of the time. I don't want to hate people. Yes, a lot of things truly piss me off and sometimes they make me so mad I could spit. Spit I tell you! Spitting is gross. It freaks me out. I have a fear of mucus. So, I would prefer not to get that mad...I digress.

Back to my point . . .

Don't be a jerk. Be nice to people. Stop worrying about how YOU are going to get to the top. Who wants to be up there anywho? I find it is generally full of assholes anyways. Do your own thing and do it with style. What'll that get you? Well, I have cool tattoos, I am a way hot Soccer Mom. My husband totally wants to do me ALL the time. I make a living doing what I love. Does it get any better? Not really. I am this happy because I CHOOSE TO BE.

So, in summary, this is what Lesley taught me: You never know when one single act of kindness will change someones life.

For the assholes out there, it may already be too late, but the closest translation for you is: Stop being a dick.

P.S. A giant shout out to @geekwithsoul for understanding what I wanted to say. You rule.

Monday, May 3, 2010

Success in Carbonite

I am writing this in anticipation that you have found my blog due to the fact you emailed me, tweeted me or called me and you got no response. You are feverishly searching for a way to contact me because you want to know why your order hasn't been confirmed...why you haven't received your order...what's going on...AHHH! SOLO SOAP! Where are you? WHERE Kylee?!


I love you.

I swear to each and everyone of you, I am getting to your orders/emails/texts/calls as fast as I can. I am honestly the only person far. (Rory starts working with me full time this week! *jumpsupanddown*)

In the last three weeks alone, I have received nearly 3,000 emails and 3 phone calls regarding Luxury Lane Soap. I sold over $8,000 worth of product in under 7 days, hitting $4,000 in sales in under three days.

I refuse to go on autopilot with this. I am responding to every correspondence personally. Seriously.

If you have any questions about anything, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE feel free to email me, tweet me, text or call me. I probably wont get a hold of you right away...

Choose your correspondence wisely...
You can find me on Twitter for a more personal experience if you'd like. Be warned, I post a lot of science fiction, geekery and general coolness. This is my personal twitter account. I should probably make a business one but that would be boring. I haven't had a lot of time to tweet but when I do, I will totally clog your time line.
Probably the best way to get a hold of me. I use to send emails instantly but I am learning how to divide my day up better for this whole Cool Mom/Hot Wife/Business Lady thing. (Dear friends, THANK YOU for letting me stress out in our emails and not being mad when I never respond. It has helped me keep my cool publicly so that everyone else thinks I am a Cool Kid. Could you even imagine what people would think if they found out I live in my pajamas cause I refuse to wear uncomfortable clothes or that I hate wearing bras and socks.? I have Star Trek AND Star Wars tattoos? Gasp and if they knew I was a teen Mom way back when and that I have liberal tendencies? Whew good thing it is only between us, right?)

Please note that if you call me, I will be the one answering my phone. My personal line just kind of became my business if you hear my children in the backround or I am in the middle of working, do not be alarmed. I am a real person and not a robot. I appreciate your calls and if you need an immediate response you will get one, a real one, unless I am eating candy, watching TNG, playing with my kids or brainstorming with my husband.

Awesome people send me cool stuff. Thank you @GEEKLEETIST for starting this trend with your freaking mind blowing coolness. I also want to thank @lisaluluquinn@katiedoyle @geeksoap @rabbitinski @CapSteveRogers @UberDorkGirlie @geekwithsoul @nerdrage42 for spoiling me with mail.

Want to send me cool stuff too?

Kylee Lane
P.O. Box 593
Primghar, IA 51245

Visit my FAQ for more information!

Thank you @darthmolen for pimping my soap and tricking @jpuent into thinking I was cool. Thank you @GeekGirls for giving me a chance to write to the world about how much I love my Nerdy little family. It was the first time I had ever been aloud to just yell to the world that I freaking rule.

The End.

No, no wait...
(Future) Thank you @PhysicistLisa for hanging out with me at #SDCC.

@jeffisageek for making that one video of my soap. I never properly thanked you for being the very very first person to ever have my soap in a blog video. *blush*

PSS! There are a ZILLION people I want to thank. I have been working on a HUGE thank you blog post for all of my lovies. Coming soooon *wink* Until then, go hit on @geekgirldiva for me. ♥